My spirit has been around the block. She is a tough old bitch with a pack of cigs rolled up in her sleeve. On the other hand, my body is new. How fascinating that each and every cell is filling out with newness, puffing up with each mitochondrial breath. I am getting to know this shiny self and learning to like being a being in a body again, a non-toxic body, one that isn’t trying to kill me.
It’s like searching for an echo in the mountains. I need to call out and make sure I’m still here.
I wake up. I am milking and juicing each minute, rounding out the corners, trying on the day to see how it fits.
Let me show you what I’ve learned. From there to here, it is a story about loosening your grip. You don’t need to reach from here to there and miss all that spaciousness in-between. That space is you grasping your sleepy boy’s hand in the night, when he coughs and you come to his bedside with a cool glass of water. That’s mom and her baby boy. He’s got the sweaty boy smell in his thick hair and sun burned cheeks, but he’s always baby to you. You are not reaching from here to there because here you are, and you are, and you are.
I am.
You are too.
Like this:
Like Loading...
Related
Published by Melissa Eppard
I am a professionally trained and certified Life Coach with personal experience overcoming cancer as a mom in my mid-30's. After a diagnosis in 2014 I began blogging as a way to communicate with my family and friends, but it soon became much more than that. Writing was my lifeboat and connection with the outside world while immune compromised and healing from surgery.
Now I’m using my personal and professional experiences and living my dream of supporting others as a Healing Hope Cancer Coach. I help my clients understand their options, develop the best care team and a supportive network. Together we unpack the experience of having a cancer diagnosis, processing the emotional impact of a cancer. I offer stress reduction techniques to help manage fear and uncertainty, and coaching to support healing on all dimensions. After treatment ends, I help people find their personal roadmap through the pain and uncertainty, to a life fueled by clarity, personal strength and a connection to their unique life purpose. From diagnosis, through treatment and recovery, no one should go it alone!
I draw upon 10+ years of work immersed in holistic health and wellness. I was born and raised in the Mid-Hudson Valley of New York and live there still with my husband and son. My survivorship blog Melissashealinghope.com chronicles my healing journey. You can learn more about my work as a coach at MelissaEppardCoaching.com.
View all posts by Melissa Eppard
Melissa's Healing Hope 
YES YOU ARE!!!
Blessed mama!
Love youuuuuu!
Oh i love this post!
It resonate with my entire being
You’re so eloquent at putting these things there are no words for into words. I’m so glad you are feeling more comfortable in your body and in being cancer-free. I can hardly believe that 3 Mother’s Days ago, in 2013, I was getting ready to say good-bye to Lefty in a few days and wanted to spend one last Mother’s Day whole. It was a hard road but I am here too. And so are you. I feel blessed to still be here.
So blessed! Happy Mother’s Day!