I manage with a healthy dose of denial. Don’t waste too much of your day fretting over what is further down the pike. Just get through today, chin up, with an occasional look down so you know where the next foot is landing. I knew this surgery was looming, and tried to brush off the… Continue reading Mostly I Feel Grateful
Tag: chemotherapy
we all want to be saved
Here is the crossroads. The new me in the old cocoon, on the doorstep of what's next. Trying to reconcile my world view, tipped on its axis. I step forward + still want to scream when I'm faced with holier than thou proclamations of how you can be saved if only I eat a certain… Continue reading we all want to be saved
On Your Mark… Get Set…
Waiting to start, a splinter of light against a vast dark. What can begin to take hold in this barren yet fertile ground? Chemotherapy strips you down, like paint thinner washing out the last self portrait. On a cellular level, diminished as each and every dark internal corner is washed in an acrid bath. It… Continue reading On Your Mark… Get Set…
Slowing down
Something is happening to my brain and my being. I am slowing, yet I can’t seem to stop. Sleep comes in 4 hour windows. I am anxious and afraid. I am softening. I cried with someone I barely know today. I let in a stranger. She came at me from the side so gently and… Continue reading Slowing down
Why we need to weep & wail & tear at our chests
I want to cry but I choke it I crumple it up & it dissolves back into me What just happened there? did I shrink just a little? Something died there a missed opportunity to rip the top off my feelings But I must steel myself There is no time for this shit What will… Continue reading Why we need to weep & wail & tear at our chests
Melissa's Healing Hope 