I am still a ways off from being tattoo ready. There will be a period of healing after this next surgery. Just yesterday, my husband and I were discussing tattoos of fake nipples vs. some other type of tattoo to cover my scars. Mostly he wants me to feel happy with my body, but I… Continue reading Mastectomy Tattoo Options
Mostly I Feel Grateful
I manage with a healthy dose of denial. Don’t waste too much of your day fretting over what is further down the pike. Just get through today, chin up, with an occasional look down so you know where the next foot is landing. I knew this surgery was looming, and tried to brush off the… Continue reading Mostly I Feel Grateful
I’m going to roll up my sleeves and show you my muscle. You might think I’m pretty strong, but I’m not.
There is this feeling of looking over my shoulder. It is very acute, like a physical cloud that follows me around making threats of rain and thunder. I am not accustomed to looking over my shoulder like this. There have been occasional regrets and grudges, but never a hunch up your shoulders and hunker down… Continue reading I’m going to roll up my sleeves and show you my muscle. You might think I’m pretty strong, but I’m not.
wake up and LIVE, just because you can
There has been too much suffering, too much sorrow. How do you combat that? How do you pick yourself up and move on? I say, STOMP that shit to the ground. Dance upon it. If your heart is still beating and as long as your body is able, let the music wash over you and… Continue reading wake up and LIVE, just because you can
Pick me up Mommy!
Tell a Mom not to use her right arm. Tell this to a Mom with a 4 year old and watch her face. I am one of those people who is never content to do just one thing at a time. While the onions are sauteing, I can get the laundry going, start a fire,… Continue reading Pick me up Mommy!
not for the faint of heart
It was a day of twisted contradictions... to begin to feel better in my skin, my soul coming back from the outer fringes of my being and settling into this here body. Energy is returning and life is resuming BUT there is a heavy truth inside, a knowing of how easily it could all be… Continue reading not for the faint of heart
a ghost of a woman
Skirting on the edge of normalcy, having endured and struggled through a most unexpected twist in my life’s path, I have turned inside out and emptied my contextualizing pockets of identity. How do I do this thing called living? My ego is scrambling, clutching at the fringes of what once was. Nothing fits the same… Continue reading a ghost of a woman
we all want to be saved
Here is the crossroads. The new me in the old cocoon, on the doorstep of what's next. Trying to reconcile my world view, tipped on its axis. I step forward + still want to scream when I'm faced with holier than thou proclamations of how you can be saved if only I eat a certain… Continue reading we all want to be saved
Waking up: The day after
I thought of this poem before I drifted off last night. I had written this shortly after my diagnosis last May. What a gift that we GET to wake up each day anew! No matter what you face, there are Gifts from God still to be had -tender morsels in each delicious moment. YOU are… Continue reading Waking up: The day after
Melissa's Healing Hope 